If
the work force in the "land of the free and home of the brave" has
taught me anything, it should be written "pursue your dreams in the late-night
hours and make those who are living their dream rich in the day time
hours". I can’t be sure if that resonates for every reader but for those
who are transitioning from job to job or from executive to absolutely nothing
but a small severance for your dedication, loss of time with family and everything
else, you know EXACTLY where I am going with this. The point that I would like
to make rather quickly is there is purpose in every position. A blessing in
every burden.
At
this current moment, I am unemployed due to a lack of perceived growth in the eyes
of my previous employer. True enough, I was dedicated and worked crazy hours. I
even traveled the country to places I could barely pronounce. I missed
birthdays and events but I gained wisdom and knowledge. I was undervalued by
the system, overlooked by the company and blind to my purpose in life. I was
such a servant and I hung onto every word that landed on my ears. Those words
were like ropes that were neatly tied around my destiny and as I hung, my
destiny did to.
The
point is, I could never be mad at my previous employer for seeing greatness in
me that I forgot to see in myself. My destiny that had been put in me at birth,
skills that couldn’t be taught in schools and most importantly purpose that
will change lives. A purpose that I obviously let linger without any regard, as
long as my check cleared. I was paid well enough to buy a new home, the car of
my dreams and vacation whenever. I had the company car, the card and the office
equipment at my side and those things were so big to me, and my dreams became
so small to me. In all transparency, I enjoyed being paid to forget the
previous pain of not having. I lived the
true life of a gypsy without nothing therefore I would like to believe most of
the worlds "strugglers" would agree with this notion too. But that is not the
purpose of the message, it’s not about the money that we are getting paid to
not struggle, it’s about the money we are getting paid to forget our purpose.
And no, I do not believe companies and employers sit in their offices and come
up with this nasty plan to bleed you dry of your purpose, (although if that
were the case, I would not be shocked) but one should ask what their value is and
measure that up against their pay check. Ten times out of ten, we are not
making our self-worth and that is what life is all about. Being valued and
adding value in every aspect of life. I was being reduced day by day
unknowingly but willingly. I loved being able to provide in areas or during
times when previously that was not the case. I was intoxicated by this
new-found ability to provide, afford and spend.
In
those materialistic moments, I was happy but in plain sight I was buying my dignity,
my recollection and my passion to purpose.
While sitting in the human resources office, I knew the inevitable was
coming. I had toyed around in this position for far too long. God was calling
me out of my job because there was more work to be done elsewhere. I had
shifted the perception of young black women in the work force and gracefully
took their no for Gods yes!
If
I haven’t made myself clear, I want to tell you that the worlds NO is Gods YES.
It’s simple, I would never become who the company wanted me to be. It’s not
that it was impossible or too hard for me
to shift into that person, but I did not fit. I was willing to become the
person the company needed me to be but God wanted to do so much more. I wanted
to become that person to secure my ability to provide but He would not allow me
to continue to squeeze myself into a box that was not designed for me to fit
into. He would not allow the money, company perks or false freedom to consume
me at the cost of the destiny being relinquished. So, if you are experiencing
this season or have witnessed someone going through something similar please
let them know the best it yet to come. Do the things that make you happy
because happiness cannot be bought nor transferred. Be sensitive to His will
and hold on tight to who you are in him and not man’s understanding of who they
want you to be. Experience God in every aspect, a provider, a giver, your peace
and joy. Happiness is in the pursuit of purpose, therefore get back to the
basics and accept that God has more for you.
Writers note: I wrote this April 5, 2017 and so much has changed. I wish I could tell you that its been easy and I have my dream job in tote but that is not the case. I sold my home, wreaked my car, repaired some friendships and severed some soul ties. I gave away ALL my furniture away and enrolled in at SNHU (creative writing degree). I know it sounds like nothing has shift but I still have my health, and that keeps me fight. Just a year ago I was hanging with family and friends and now I am fighting for my happiness, reaching towards my destiny. I have strong faith in the promise's of God. I am not ashamed of my process nor will I rush my process. God never said there wouldn't be trials and tribulations, but He did promise that the weapons that form would not prosper. Keep the faith and know who's you are.
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